Article
What if church is part of what hurt me?
It is possible to still love God and to feel unsafe in a sanctuary. Both can be true at the same time.
The short answer
Harm that happens in a church setting affects faith, community and trust together. Counseling can address that without requiring you to defend, explain or return to anything before you are ready.
What this often looks like
- Dread on Sunday mornings.
- Faith that feels intact privately and impossible corporately.
- Anger that you have been told is unspiritual.
- Loneliness, because your community and your wound are the same place.
- Difficulty trusting leaders, or anyone speaking with authority.
How it is held here
Nobody will defend the institution to you, and nobody will require you to make a decision about church attendance in order to do this work. Your experience gets to be described accurately.
If your faith itself is part of what you want to sort out, that is welcome. If you want faith left out entirely, that is respected.
What the work usually involves
Naming what happened, grieving it, addressing the anxiety or depression that often follows, and slowly deciding what you want your spiritual life to look like now. That last part is yours to decide.
Common questions
Will you tell me to go back to church?
No. That decision belongs to you.
Can I still talk about God with you?
Yes, as much or as little as you want.
Is this counseling or spiritual direction?
Either can fit. Lori can help you choose based on what you are carrying.
Learn more about Christian counseling with Lori with Lori, or browse all articles on Christian counseling.
Written by Lori Rasmussen, LISW, a Licensed Independent Social Worker licensed in the State of Iowa and a Certified Spiritual Director. Lori counsels women and female students in Waterloo, Iowa and online across Iowa. Articles here are meant to help you understand what you may be experiencing; they are not a diagnosis and they do not take the place of care from a professional who knows your story.
Reaching out can be the first step.
You don't need to know exactly what to say, or have anything figured out, before you contact Lori.
Or email rasmussencounselingandsd@gmail.com